Diane

My dear sister..last night I saw you take your final flight... past the moon..on the wings of an angel...you will be loved and missed until we are together again..give mommy a hug and kiss for me!

It has been quite awhile since Ive been here. I imagine you're wondering why I blog and noone posts . I dont think of this as a regular blog persay. I've given out the address to 2 people and some how I dont suspect I'll ever see their etchings on these pages. This blog spot gives me a chance to post things pertinent to what is going on in my little corner of the world. It may look like a bunch of hodge podge to someone who happens across it. Trust when I say these little snippets here are life changing events for me. all in a matter of a 5 year span I lost the man I was with for 20 years and loved dearly. I moved from Pennsylvania where the hustle and bustle of the big city echoed in my mind daily to a rural area of the 'prettiest small town in the south' in North Carolina to see if I could finish growing here and hopefully flourish. Soon after coming here I had a life altering event take place inwhich I had an oopherectomy and needed to learn better ways to treat myself in order to get back to feeling well and move forward. My Mother and best friend in the whole wide world took ill and passed away ...while my sister was diagnosed with cervical cancer that metastisized and went to her brain..its been several years and now I believe she will soon be with mama. All of the events arent as heart wrenching because my beautiful daughter met the man of her dreams and they are living the best life and loving each other truly, madly, deeply. I know Ive just created more hodge podge here, but in doing so I am determined to take each event and disect them over the next few weeks...I know better days are coming and the hope of being a memom is on the horizon...and so begins a chance for me to once again let my hair down.

Put Your Records On Lyrics

Just another , ordinary miracle today

I just wanted to take a moment and tell you that I had the most normal and pleasing conversations last night..one that was full of humor and morsels of past lives and future thoughts. A true exchange of 'I said' and 'she said' and also lyrics to a song were sung and a few words spelled. maybe to others this is normal everyday things that occur in a conversation....to me it was a bittersweet reminder of my sister.
for today..I am so thankful for that conversation and promise to be patient with the hope of more like it!

Make a Smilebox postcard

Sand Dune

ready or not

My daughter is getting married....

I'm not exactly sure how I should be responding when friends and family ask me if "I'm ready" Since Im new to being a "Mother of the Bride" I imagine I am feeling exactly the way I should be feeling. Elated, delighted, happy, overjoyed, blissful and cheerful afterall my daughter found the man of her dreams!

Im taken back time and time again to the moment I asked GOD if I was to be fortunate enough to have a child could I please have a daughter. My prayers were answered and not only was I granted a daughter nonetheless a daughter who is kind and congenial and considerate and amiable and compassionate and charitable and best of all we are so in love with each other..I feel more then blessed!

I so recall holding that precious little baby in my arms and wondering if I was able to give her all the love and nurturing a child needs and deserves and thinking how much she depends upon me for everything. I sat on the sofa reflecting upon how perfect in form this child is and also how small as she fit so comfortably against me all 7 lbs and 14 ozs of her.

For whatever reason I never had a son. My daughter has chosen to marry a man that not only makes her happy beyond definition but is what I imagine my son to be like. I am fortunate to be able to call Steven my son and his family...my extended family. How fortuitous!

Heidi and Steven have chosen 08/08/08 as the date of their nuptials as the 8's represent infinity a beginning with no end.

being an integral part of all things family...my answer to the question is...Of course I'm ready.